When we think about caring for an older parent or relative, most of us jump straight to the practical side making sure the fridge is stocked, the medication is taken, and the heating is on. All of that matters, of course, but there is another side that is just as important: mental health.
How your mum or dad feels day to day – whether they feel connected, valued, and content – can have as much impact on their quality of life as any medication or medical appointment. In the UK, Age UK has found that hundreds of thousands of older people live with depression or anxiety, but many don’t get the support they need. Loneliness, bereavement, or the loss of independence often play a role.
The good news is, you don’t need grand gestures to make a difference. Small, thoughtful actions, done consistently, can bring real comfort and stability. Here are some practical ways to support your loved one’s mental health at home.
Stay socially connected
Loneliness is one of the biggest risks to wellbeing in later life. If you notice your parent spending long stretches of the day alone, even simple steps can help. Phone calls on set days, short visits for a cup of tea, or encouraging neighbours to check in can make someone feel part of the world again.
If distance or work makes that hard, consider arranging regular companionship care. Having a carer who comes by not just to “do tasks” but to sit, listen, and share a chat gives older adults something to look forward to and a person they can rely on. The consistency is what makes the difference – knowing that they are not forgotten or left to manage on their own.
Bring joy through familiar activities
Think about the things your loved one has always enjoyed. It might be baking, tending to the garden, doing a crossword, or watching old films. When those activities slip away, life can feel smaller. Encouraging them back into the routine, or even joining in yourself, can bring joy and spark conversation.
For example, if your mum used to bake, ask her to show you how to make one of her favourite recipes. Let her take the lead while you do the heavy lifting. If your dad loved gardening but can no longer manage it alone, you could set up raised beds or pots that are easier to reach, and work on them together. These little adjustments let older people keep their hobbies without feeling they are a burden.
Encourage gentle movement
Exercise is powerful for both mind and body, but it doesn’t have to mean long walks or gym sessions. It could be as simple as walking to the corner shop, stretching in the living room, or doing a lap around the garden. Movement releases endorphins – the “feel good” chemicals – and can ease stress and lift mood.
If your loved one is reluctant, make it sociable. Suggest a walk after lunch, or put on some music and encourage a little dance in the kitchen. Some families in Belfast find that even light housework, done together with encouragement, keeps people active without feeling like “exercise”. The key is regularity and fun, not intensity.
Create comforting routines
In later life, unpredictability can make people feel anxious. Having a rhythm to the day gives structure and a sense of control. This might mean set times for meals, watching the same programme in the evening, or a regular morning walk.
If your parent struggles with memory, writing a simple schedule and pinning it on the fridge can be surprisingly reassuring. Carers also play a big role in creating consistency – arriving at the same times each day, following familiar routines, and gently encouraging structure. That stability reduces worry and helps older people feel safe in their own home.
Be present and listen
Sometimes the best care doesn’t involve doing anything at all – it’s just being there. Many older people carry worries they don’t share because they don’t want to burden their family. Sitting down with a cup of tea, leaving your phone aside, and letting them talk can be more valuable than any practical help.
Listening with patience, even if the same stories come up again, shows respect and love. And when more difficult topics come up – fears about health, grief for lost friends, or worries about the future – it helps them to know their feelings are acknowledged. They may not want solutions, just someone to listen.
Look out for subtle changes
Mental health struggles don’t always shout; often they whisper. A parent who was once interested in cooking no longer bothers. Someone who loved chatting suddenly keeps quiet. Sleep patterns may change, or energy levels dip.
As a family member, you’re often the first to spot these subtle shifts. Don’t brush them off as “just old age”. Ask gently how they’re feeling. Sometimes reassurance is enough. Other times, professional advice may be needed. Carers, because they spend regular time with older adults, are often the first to notice these changes and can raise concerns early.
How Visiting Angels Northern Ireland Can Help
At Visiting Angels Belfast, we believe mental health and emotional wellbeing are at the heart of good care. Our carers are there not just to help with meals or housework but to bring companionship, encouragement, and kindness into everyday life.
Whether it’s enjoying a walk in the fresh air, baking together, or simply sitting down for a chat, our care services in Belfast are designed to make life brighter, not just easier.
If you’d like to talk about how we can support your loved one, call us today on 028 9002 9123 or email belfast@visiting-angels.co.uk.